Saturday, May 28, 2011

Confessions of a Carboholic

It's been a month since I've had any of my favorite little tastes...toast with butter and jam, bagels, English muffins, sandwiches, cereal, pasta, rice, tortillas....mmmmm. Not to mention anything bottled tea with "just a hint of sugar" in it, no desserts, no brown sugar in my oatmeal, no ice cream snacks, you get the picture. Well, I have to admit that I've had a couple of tiny "cheats" when I was attending an activity and my willpower gave way. But they have been very few and far between. I *love* my carbs and I cannot believe I have stuck with this darned diet that does not allow me to partake. But as of yesterday, I have officially lost 10 pounds so I have to grudgingly proclaim that it is working. I've also been exercising, but not as much as I could. :)

I was a skinny kid, an uncurvy teenager and a small woman till my 30s. I always ate what I wanted and "had a good metabolism," whatever that means. Having three kids gave me some extra poundage that I never quite lost. I can remember hitting 112 (before you scream at me, remember I am only 4'11" and never broke 100 till I got pregnant the first time) and being shocked. SHOCKED. The worst part was when I told my ex and he thought I said "120," repeating it to his family. UGH. I was not happy. "120?!! NO WAY! I said 112!" I never thought I would reach 120! OMG!

Add more years and more pounds, a little gain here, a little loss there. Add a move to Alaska and a chef husband. Add inconsistent gym commitments, a little up and a little down but no significant loss to maintain. Add menopause. Not only did I surpass 120 but I was on my way to 130 when we got back from our last vacation. Yes, 129.5. My all-time high. How in the world did that happen?! I really do see now how weight gain just kinda creeps up on people a little bit at a time. Before you know it, you're in a struggle to get rid of it instead of just staying healthy all along.

Rich and I both decided we'd better do something now or we were on our way to health problems and a miserable old age (I am being dramatic, but you know what I mean). Mix in the fact that I finally had to give up and get the next larger jeans, which I was totally unhappy about. Beat in an upcoming trip to the Jersey shore where we did not want to be embarrassed. Recipe for disaster, no? "Time to get serious!" we exclaimed for the umpteenth time. Mind you, we have engaged in similar projects before. We have made ourselves go to the gym every. single. freakin. day. and limited our eating. We have lost a little (me) or a lot (Rich) and gained it all back when we stopped hiking when the weather turned and blew off those trips to the gym, combined with eating our way through yet another vacation. Face it, it's just not that much fun to be so darned healthy all the time.

So yesterday I broke the 120 barrier and am down to 119.5. I never thought I would be thrilled about that number, but I am. I still have a belly and my whole midsection is "out of whack." But progress is being made. Yippee! We have one more month before the shore so we will see how well I do. It's funny, but after a month, I don't really think about those foods nearly as much as I did at first. Yeah, I would still love some buttery, cheesy popcorn while being a couch potato watching a movie. I will say again that this is really no fun. But I guess it's not about fun, is it?!

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